An Unknown Future, a Known God

Dear Diary, 25 August 2012

"Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God."
-Corrie Ten Boom

Sometimes, it's hard to wholly trust God, especially when something you want so badly is just within your grasp. Last night, my youth pastor told us that prayer isn't a plea that we will change God's will, it's a desire to become more in line with what His plan already is. As the 19th century philosopher Kierkegaard said, "The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays." Although Soren meant the comment as criticism, he actually struck a true chord. As Paul said, "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." (Galatians 2:20)

It's easy to view praying as asking God to go your way. With that mindset, it's easy to be let down. You put so much faith in the influence of these little prayers you're firing away, and when things don't turn out the way you wanted, the fingers automatically point to God.

But think for a minute, God is the Creator of the Universe. He mapped out everything to work perfectly and completely to each purpose. It is He "who alone is immortal and who lives in unapproachable light, whom no one has seen or can see." (1 Tim 6:16).  In comparison to such greatness, we, as a fallen people, are small and inexplicably meager. Who are we to try and alter the course of time that He has so brilliantly orchestrated? Therefore, we should instead use prayer as a recognition of our own ignorance: to plead with God to help us understand everything that is happening to us and to get through it with faith and diligence.

God isn't the game-maker upstairs working viciously to whip us into perfect shape by moving the pieces of our lives into proverbial checkmates. No, He doesn't want to stump us. He wants us to teach us. Remember, "at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly." (Rom 5:6). That's us! So let's "approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." (Hebrews 4:16). Doesn't that sound better than trying to figure out a way for everything to turn out well for our own interests and also to convince God to fulfill our order? I think so.

This isn't a full-proof guarantee that everything in your life will work out peachy. Ultimately, we know our lives will end in perfection for us who believe in Jesus as our Savior, but I've always been comforted by this one line from the movie Love Comes Softly. "Missy could fall down and hurt herself, even if I'm walking right there beside her. That doesn't mean that I allowed it to happen. She knows, as far as unconditional love, I'll pick her up and I'll carry her. I'll try to heal her. I'll cry when she cries. And I'll rejoice when she is well. In all the moments of my life, God has been right there beside me. The truth of God's love is not that He allows bad things to happen. It's His promise that He'll be there with us when they do."

Absent-minded and Nostalgic

Dear Diary, 8 August 2012

Things have been crazy in my life lately. People have been getting sick, plans have been written and rewritten until they're nothing but indistinguishable blurs on my schedule, and school is fast approaching. So considering, it's nothing short of a miracle that I haven't lost my mind yet!

I don't usually post pictures, but here are some nice ones that I just had to share. Writing takes time and imagination, two things I have been lacking lately. In recompense, I hope you enjoy these photos.

It's been sad, going through my Grandmother's old clothes. I wish she were well and able to go through them with my mother and I, but wearing the styles she pieced together (even crafted) herself makes me feel a little closer to her.

I've always loved this ruffled, red skirt. In this picture, I had just pulled the skirt on over my denim shorts and pranced around so my Grandma could see the layers ripple around my legs. She got a kick out of that. :)

Babysitting is fun when it's with my little cousins. In this picture, Irish was crawling into the fort we'd constructed as it stormed outside. Not long after the four of us wiggled under the blankets and sheets, the lights blinked and then went out. Screaming gleefully, the kids scrambled for the flashlights and had the best time for the next few minutes until the power returned.

Going through old photos, this one came up. Me, my daddy, and my little bro. Oh, so cute!

Douglas was sent down to the water while Sophia stood and watched. Quite a challenge, keeping my tomboyish cousin from sliding down the wall to join him catching minnows. Sadly, the little fishies didn't make it through the night. Guess we shouldn't go into any aquatic fields.

Even if Lee thought it was silly, I think this picture of her in my mom's old fashioned gown is lovely. The rose was a nice affect.

Now, I must return to the seemingly endless painting that must be done throughout our house. Perhaps I will find the inspiration to write something witty later on.